“I am comfortable looking in the mirror saying ‘I love you, I really love you'” – Louise Hay
Well, are you really?
Here’s what some of my clients say:
“It took a long time to be able to say I like myself, I’m still working on my self-talk!”
“I can’t look at myself in the mirror and say this, I don’t truly believe it”
“But I don’t love myself, saying I do when I don’t makes me feel ill.”
Ok then. Louise has it right; being able to love ourselves is so important. However, this is an ideal, and most people are not there yet. I believe that we can’t push ourselves to love ourselves if firstly we don’t believe we deserve to be loved.
Yes that’s also a key factor – check out my post on Self Love if you want more on that.
So I asked my Facebook Group “Do you deserve the time it will take to put in the work to learn about your self-talk?”
Here’s some of the responses:
“It has taken me at least 2 years but i feel so much better than i used to. Yes i do deserve it”
“I know I deserve it but for me, writing things out helps. I will not only ‘see’ what I think..I can give it actual thought to turn that negative thought around. I am not very good at doing it on the spot.”
“I’m starting to correct myself when I notice negative self talk. Its hard to notice sometimes but my Love (partner) will point it out to me and I will say ‘Yea your right!'”
Here’s the piece – it does take work, and effort to get to know yourself, and to learn to like yourself, and then to accept yourself, and love yourself. It’s a process. Give yourself the space to do it, don’t expect it to happen overnight. And the more compassion, the more patience you have with yourself, the more you have to offer in your relationships with others. To close with a comment from one of you:
“If I am to truly love others I have to start with me. It takes work. It takes practice. If my goal is to be more loving to others then…it begins with me. I am worth the effort.”
Join me every week as I cover the 4 pillars of self-care over January in my Weekly Email Tips. Come by my Facebook group and talk about your journey with a supportive group of beautiful amazing people. Just like you are – even if you’ve forgotton.