When you release your expectations around how things “should be” and become more comfortable with what is, you can begin to see the stress and anxiety that you needlessly create for yourself. It’s okay to admit it – we all do it, and once we see what it is, we can stop and create peace instead.
The thing that people appear to be anxious the most about, funnily enough, is around the anxiety itself. Being anxious about being anxious! It’s not even happened yet and already people worry that they will be worried. Don’t you think that we create all of that anxiety just through our anticipation of it?
For example, two people recently told me that anniversaries of the death of loved ones are around the corner. They find this time of year very difficult because they become severely anxious. I suggested that they disconnect from the man made date and time of the death of their loved one, and instead, reconnect to the love that’s there, all around them, all the time. Why do we need time anyway?
We need a date and time to know what time to show up for things, what day it is, when the weekend is, but honestly the date and time serves no more purpose than that. Truly. For example, the o’clock tells us that it’s time for dinner, that it’s nearly time to pick up our child from her playdate, or that the movie is starting in half an hour. But paying attention to chronological time disconnects us from our true selves. If it’s time for dinner, we eat without checking in with our body to ask our body if it’s hungry. We have become more connected to what time it is than to our selves, and dinner is no longer about being hungry at all.
A client of mine who has been coming for about 2 years said to me “I’m not wearing a watch any more. I notice all the people around me with their big watches, they’re so proud of them, but I’m happier without mine.” I’ve not worn a watch myself for several years, and I make people take their watches off before a hands on healing session. Not because the watch will get in the way of the healing, but because it gets in the way for me. Perhaps this is why!
Love transcends space and time. Did you hear that? Love is all around us, all the time, no matter what time it is. Whether our bodies live or die, our souls are connected to each other, through love. While thinking about the issue of time vs love, I was drawn to Facebook and I found a Rumi quote, or should I say the Rumi quote found me (what you seek is seeking you… Hmm another Rumi quote!). Anyway this one said: “Come out of the circle of time and into the circle of love.” Which was exactly what I just said. He knows some good stuff, that Rumi.
So how do we put this learning into practice? That’s the real issue. Knowing something is very different to living by it. We can live by the clock, but can we truly embody love? If we feel more connected to love than to a date and time, we don’t have to wait until the anniversary of the passing of our loved one to speak to them the words we long to say. We can always carry them in our hearts. Yes indeed, we can honour the date and time, but do it in the dimension of date and time, marking an occasion, for what it is. The love is always there. This is the work of healing, the work of the soul. And next time it’s dinnertime, why not spend a few minutes checking in with your body and asking it if it’s hungry!
Abby Wynne is available for Skype Sessions, or for Email Mini Sessions. Click here to find out more.