Not every question has a direct and specific answer. When my clients ask me this one, each time I explain it, it comes out a little differently! Here is my current thinking on this subject.
What is an energy cord?
An energy cord is an energetic connection between two individuals, a little like the umbilical cord. Energy cords create flow between the biological energy fields of those people who are connected, so that their life force energy mixes and flows, back and forth through the cord.
Cords can create an enhanced psychic connection between the two individuals, it can also be draining, as someone usually takes the energy and the other person gives. This happens either unconsciously, or subconsciously. People who are connected by energy cords usually feel closer together, but sometimes it can feel like you’re too close.
Once a person brings awareness to energy cords, they usually can ‘see’ or feel them, and can cut them. The ‘bounce back’ when the life force energy returns once a cord is cut can be quite profound, depending on the nature of the relationship between the people involved.
Energy cords can be re-created in the background subconsciously, so cord-cutting needs to be a regular thing until you train your subconscious mind to stop connecting to someone that way.
Why do we create energy cords?
When a baby is growing in the womb it connects to its mother via an umbilical cord. Through that cord it receives the nourishment it needs to help it grow and develop. When the baby is born, the cord is cut, and the baby becomes physically separated from its mother. Imagine that moment where the proud mama holds her baby for the first time, and looks into it’s eyes, and the baby looks back and feels safe. At that moment, I believe, the mother and baby subconsciously create an energetic cord, in lieu of the physical cord, because they both need that closeness and holding of each other.
We as humans by our nature grow attached to things, and to each other. One of the buddhist lessons is to let go of all of our attachments. Even Yoda said “Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose”. However that does take time, maturity and will power to do. And it’s so very hard! Many people cannot do this, and as we attach to things, based on the primal cord we made with mama, we make more and more cord attachments to the people that we love, who, in turn, reciprocate the connection.
As baby grows into toddler it wants to explore the world around it, and it needs the space to do that. There is a whole psychological field called ‘Attachment theory’, based on the work of Bowlby, based on this crucial time. The relationship between mother and baby when baby goes exploring seeps into all of baby’s relationships as baby grows older. Even the romantic ones. Co-dependant relationships, unhealthy dynamics and healthy ones too can all be traced back in the realms of psychology to the state of the relationship between mama and baby at this particular time in life. I find it quite astonishing, and much of it rings true to me.
Why we need to cut energy cords
Our energy cords go beyond space and time, and the neediness that we have towards the other is what makes those cords tighter, bigger and stronger. And the neediness of the mama to keep the baby close, is what forges those strong bonds, that then become mimicked in the baby as it grows into child, then adult, and wants to keep a loved one close, usually out of fear of abandonment.
As time goes by, and we attach more and more cords to more and more people. It can get very messy! Particularly when you are still connected to someone you are no longer in relationship with. Or connected to someone that is very needy, and drains you.
I have found that the dependancy created between people who are connected is more often than not an unhealthy one. But we need to connect to something, that’s the nature of humans! So rather than a person, we can train ourselves in to connect to pure, source energy instead. That way, we can pull down fresh, life force healing energy. It feels wonderful to be clear and clean of energy cords, and to feel anchored by the connection to Source, rather than to anchor into people.
How to cut energy cords
Simply by setting your intention to cut a cord, you can cut a cord. But some cords are more difficult to cut than others. I write more about this in my book “How to Be Well”, where I discuss how energy cords can effect relationships with one person becoming dominant and the other subordinate. I give ways to change the relationship dynamic both psychologically, and energetically, as I have found it very empowering (and get faster results) to work with both the energy and the mind at the same time.
If you feel you want to cut cords with someone right now after reading this, simply visualise your energy field, allow it to show you the cords, and imagine them melting away. Or you could try my free SoundCloud meditation, called ‘Quick Cord Cutting Exercise” where I can help you do it!
You can also contact me if you feel your cords are too tangled up and too overwhelming for you to deal with them yourself. Just email me email@example.com and let me help you untangle yourself, free yourself up and let in pure, source energy so that you can be the vibrant and bright being that you have the potential to be!